Matthew's Got Talent

When I was a kid I wanted to be a singer when I grew up. I always thought I was good at it and my dad thought I was the best. I don't know if I was really good or not but I sure felt like it when I was 'practicing' in the shower. The closest I ever got to singing professionally was occasionally sitting in with my dad's bluegrass band and later hosting my very own Karaoke show. Barely a living and hardly a "star". The older I got the less likely my dream of stardom was bound to be reality. In fact I pretty much stopped singing all together. But since that was all my heart was ever set on - once that dream faded away I didn't really have a clue what I should do or what "else" I wanted to be. I just was. I settled in the veterinary field - a nice job but hardly glamorous. And so that's what I "am" - I'm a professional animal hospital employee. I like it just fine and it pays the bills. Is it what I've wanted my whole life? No.

It's funny how life becomes what it does whether we like it or not. And life certainly has a way of becoming itself without any outside interference. There was a time when I thought I'd die if I couldn't sing. I wanted to be famous and I felt like I was a person that everyone needed to know. I was going to be a singer, nevermind I didn't have a plan to make that become reality. There was no Star Search, no American Idol shows, it was just going to happen for me - famous singer. It never occurred to me that it wouldn't be my future. And it certainly never dawned on me that I might become a mother instead. It never crossed my mind - I didn't even want to be a mom. But I am, and I'm blessed and so happy about it and now I sing to my son.

When Matthew was a newborn I would rock him for hours singing to him. I didn't know many lull-a-byes so I just sang whatever came to mind. One day I had no idea that dad was listening to me when I heard him laughing out loud - I'd been singing to my precious infant baby "Still Doin' Time in a Honky Tonk Prison"; a George Jones classic. Um, ok. Matt didn't mind though - and dad got a good laugh over it. At least my experience as a karaoke girl wasn't an entire waste of time! These days we sing his homework, his name, his punishment - anything we can squeeze into a tune. I've also gotten him several instruments and a microphone just hoping he'll catch the music bug. This morning he was singing his heart out in the shower and I applauded him when he was through. Of course he was mad at me for listening to him and told me to get out! I'm hoping with a little encouragement (and pushing and prodding on the part of his wanna-be crazy stage mom) maybe he'll be the next American Idol (about 11 years from now) and I can live out my dream through him! Now that life has done it's thing - and made me what I am today - I can't imagine anything but motherhood! Mom and veterinary technician is what I am and one of these days - with some talent and a whole lot of luck Matthew can be the famous singer and I can quit my veterinary hospital job and get on his payroll as manager! Maybe the dream is still alive?